For the most part, the rich and the famous do live glamorous lives here in LA. I could write about all the wonderful first dates I have heard about lately from some famous names. But, wouldn’t you rather hear about a bad date instead? To know that the rich and the beautiful are like the rest of us and face funny little challenges in their love lives too? Here is a little story about the Australian who wasn’t, coupled with the lesson that sometimes, yes, size does in fact matter. Same goes for honesty and accuracy. 

This story is about a friend of mine’s first date with a guy she met online. For the sake of protecting the innocent, and in honor of the premier of Sex & The City 2, let’s call her Carrie. Carrie is drop-dead gorgeous; a beautiful, classy and graceful model from eastern Europe who has recently moved to the United States to further her modeling and acting career in this land of opportunity. Here is an incognito picture of Carrie feeding an Oreo to a squirrel. Did I mention she loves animals?

Recently, Carrie met a self-proclaimed Australian man online and decided to go on a date with him. Carrie questioned whether her date-to-be were in fact Australian as his accent was a bit off. If you have ever done any online dating, you know people aren’t always completely honest about themselves. And the honesty meter sometimes takes even a deeper dive south here in LA. The man, let’s call him Dundee, told Carrie he would bring her a an Australian Kangaroo as a gift on their first date and as proof of his Australian-ness. Uhm, OK, men, if you are reading this – just know that a gift on the first date is not necessary and probably not a good idea either. BUT, if you insist and decide to risk your entire first impression with a gift, at least don’t bring something that you probably got out of a $.25 arcade machine… Oh and one more thing; perhaps do a little bit of research. This is Dundee’s gift:

In case you’re confused, so was Carrie. Carrie ain’t from Australia. But she can spot a (clip on) Koala bear a mile away even if it’s a dwarf . And yes, that is a Dixie cup towering over the “Kangaroo.” And no, sadly for Dundee, there will not be a second date.